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Wed 21st August 2019
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HOROSCOPE

Horoscope for the month of June

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Aries – Your partner will cheat on you this month but it is only because you have been seeing someone behind his/ her back since last few years. Other than this, your relationship will remain as strong as ever.

 

Taurus – You will die alone, unmourned, and unloved, but because you do it on live television, you will still manage to be considered a success.

 

Gemini – It is going to be your lucky month. You will be hit by an ambulance. Try carrying your medical insurance card at all times to ensure a smoother outcome.

 

Cancer – You try to be a person with a good perspective on life and a firm view of right and wrong, but you will soon find yourself adopting a Pomsky (a cross between Pomeranian and Husky).

 

Leo – You will be devastated by the news that you could have stopped a major tragedy in Nigeria if you had only answered their pleading emails in time.

 

Virgo – You will never again hear a negative word spoken of you, thanks to your sweet nature and an unfortunate diving accident on account of which you lost most of your hearing ability.

 

Libra – You are about to embark on a great journey across an infinite ocean of possibilities, unless of course the more cynical theories about the afterlife are correct.

 

Scorpio – Love, wisdom, and luck are all strong in your zodiac sign this month, providing further proof that you have not got your zodiac sign right.

 

Sagittarius – You are trying to live healthier, but you will continue refusing to give up cigarettes, since they remain the most preferred way to light fires by arsonists.

 

Capricorn – The planetary alignment is most favourable for you to travel this month. You will have a guy with no arms sit next to you in your cabin class journey this month.

 

Aquarius – Your old solution is not going to work on your new problem. Try drinking twice as much.

 

Pisces – The stars have nothing to say to you this week, as they are trying to work on their own future for once, if you don’t mind.

Yes, you heard it right! We’re now on the lookout for new authors whose ideas can challenge our reader’s thinking and bring a smile on their face. So, if you have a brilliant idea for a contribution, please write to us at contact@themumbaipost.com

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